*part of a series of posts I am cross-posting. I'm finally within the MySpace timeline, which means these posts will be dated the actual date/time they were originally posted*
For the longest time I didn't know what it was that if I quite literally don't get to play at least an hour of *something* I get all pissy and bitchy. At first I thought it was stress, I needed to unwind, but as I no longer go to work anymore and pretty much the only responsibility I have is watching Meaghan I have kind of ruled that out.(though maybe some of you would consider bringing up a kid *work*, it is but in a different way that isn't really stressful most of the time unless she's had a really bratty day).I think it comes down to this... video games are full of women who are strong and kick ass and can hold thier own. the kind of woman that's more or less one of the boys, only with boobs. The kind of women who would kill you with 6 different weapons and 16 kinds of ammo if you even looked at them the wrong way never mind what would happen if you betrayed them or cheated on them or lied to them. The kind of woman I wish I could be. the kind of woman I am in my head or alone in my house but then as soon as I actually have to make due on the murder threats in my mind I turn back into the RL me, the one who shys away from conflict and tries to be good and obiedient and gets fucked over by her family and friends for it.But it's not just that, the games are also full of men, the kind of men who are true men, the kind who grab thier sack and go out into battle because they believe in a cause, and the cause is usually beneficial for thier contries or even the sake of the entire world. And thier rewards are usually not fame or fortune or even sex (unless of course you are playing Grand Theft Auto but those aren't the kind of games I am reffering to) but mostly just the satisfaction of being a hero and the glow that comes from making sure the world is safe (at least until the next installment). I realized this because so recently I have been addicted to Elder Scrolls IV: Oblivion (I also played ESIII: Morrowind, but didn't find it as addictive for some reason) and I realized the reason why is that I'm playing this Orc Warrior. He's not handsome, he starts off as a criminal, but he takes on this huge quest anyways for a country that had initially forsaken him. he's not in it for the girls, he might be in it a little bit for the kill, it's certainly not for the gold because no matter how much crap I lug back from the dungeons he's still poor as hell. So I started thinking back, and of course there's Basch, my latest game crush from Final Fantasy XII, who is not only good looking (though in some weird way he reminds me of one of my exes, but not one of the bad ones one of the ones I wish would have worked out) he's pretty much been framed and stuck in a dungeon and dares to fight back anyways. And of course there's Cloud (FFVII), genetically fucked with, given a phoney past, and still willing to die to rescue the world from Jenova. I could go on.. but you get the picture.But you know what I don't picture any of these guys doing? Go on I know you know the answer from one of my previous posts:WAITING UNTIL THIER SICK WIVES GO TO SLEEP FROM ALL THE NYQUIL SHE NEEDS TO TAKE TO GET RID OFF A COLD YOU BROUGHT HOME FROM YOUR WORK, AND THEN GOING ONLINE AND LOOKING AT PORN AND THEN LYING ABOUT IT STRIAGHT TO HER FACE WHEN SHE ASKS YOU ABOUT IT!!!!And people wonder why I wish I could just crawl inside my console...... FUCKING RL MENGO VIDEO GAME DUDES, RL MEN WISH THEY HAD HALF THE BALLS YOU DID, AND YOUR BALLS ARE VIRTUAL!!!!!!!Update: Well we got a lot of stuff worked out since then. Hopefully if he ever sees this he will understand the venom. I am leaving it up because I find it a bit revealing. I am always more apt to be honet about feelings when I am completely pissed off.